When you take boys to a triathlon

When you take boys to watch their uncle in a triathlon
They will want to be in a triathlon too.



When they are in a triathlon
They will have permanent marker on their body for days.



When they have permanent marker on their body
They will need to go into very very very cold water.



When they go into that very very very cold water
They will have to swim 100 yards.



After they swim in very cold water they will have to run up a beach
Dip their feet in water to rinse off the sand
Dry their feet on a towel
Put on sneakers
And a bike helmet
And a belt with their racing number
And walk their bike out of the "transition" area
With no adult help
And start riding a bike for 1 and 1/2 miles.



After riding 1 and 1/2 miles they will have to get off their bikes
And run half of a mile.



After running half of a mile they will get a medal
which they will promptly take off their necks and place on their little cousin



After getting the medal back from their nearly 2-year-old cousin
They will collapse on a sea wall to drink lots of water



While drinking lots of water
They will talk between gasping for air about how they plan on doing another triathlon.


With apologies to Laura Joffe Numeroff, author of If You Give a Mouse a Cookie.