Thursday, March 01, 2007

For Good

I'm writing on someone else's blog today. First read her amazing piece then find the link to mine.

From the Musical Wicked-

I've heard it said
That people come into our lives for a reason
Bringing something we must learn
And we are led
To those who help us most to grow
If we let them
And we help them in return
Well, I don't know if I believe that's true
But I know I'm who I am today
Because I knew you:

Like a comet pulled from orbit
As it passes a sun
Like a stream that meets a boulder
Halfway through the wood
Who can say if I've been changed for the better?
But because I knew you
I have been changed for good

We have all had people in our life who have come and gone, and it hurt. Maybe they left because they died, maybe they left because you had a fight, maybe they left because they moved away. But there is someone, for all of us, who came and went and changed us irrevocably. And we never forget them.

For me, it was an ex-boyfriend from college. He saved my life. I mean literally saved my life. I was having a violent altercation with an ex-boyfriend, and a male friend walked into my dorm room unexpectedly and beat the crap out of him. We started dating the next year.

We had a terrible relationship. He was a rich pretty boy who never really worked for anything in his life. He came from a lot of money. He believed he was just entitled to things. He had graduated and would never call, but would just show up at my door and expected me to be there.

But he loved me, and I loved him. But we fought, not violently, but we fought. We had that kind of ignitable passion that makes for good love and bad arguing. I expected things of him and he had never had anyone expect things of him. He couldn't get fired from the job because it was for Daddy, so he never had to show. We broke up after 6 months and it was bad. It ended with me saying to him in a bar "best of luck to you in life."

For most of my adult life, before I met my husband, I somehow believed we would end up together. I really thought I would walk into a room somewhere one day and he would be there. And that would be it.

I still think about him, because I honestly believe if it was not for him I may not be here. At least not the me as I am now. Something very bad was going to happen to me, and he stopped it. I like to think that he thinks about me, and knows that I am grateful for what he did.

It well may be
That we will never meet again
In this lifetime
So let me say before we part
So much of me
Is made of what I learned from you
You'll be with me
Like a handprint on my heart
And now whatever way our stories end
I know you have re-written mine
By being my friend:

Like a ship blown from its mooring
By a wind off the sea
Like a seed dropped by a skybird
In a distant wood
Who can say if I've been changed for the better?
But because I knew you:
Because I knew you:
I have been changed for good

This post is part of The Blog Exchange. Jodi is mom to an almost 2 year old, a part-time lawyer, and wife. She blogs at Jodifur about all these things and many more. Please visit her terrific site, and you will see Allison's post!

Hostess note: And yes, for those of you that read this blog regularly, I wrote about the same song in November.

10 comments:

Jenn said...

(I have to login as with a Blogger account on the Jodifur site, so I am just going to make the comment here)

When I was in Taoyuan, "Where the streets have no name" was perpetually in my head.

Crystal Waters would have been a little less depressing at least.

Although Bono did have a mullet then.

Who would have known that a Crystal Waters song could have helped create such a thoughtful post?

nutmeg said...

You made me think of a very special person today...thanks!

Damselfly said...

It's so true that every relationship makes us who we are today....

Amanda said...

Wondrous how life sends us what/who we need!

soccer mom in denial said...

Jodi,

It has been an honor to be your hostess this month. I've been thinking about the song and your story for days and will continue to do so for day to come.

MamaLee said...

What a great post. LOVE the musical, too. Thanks for sharing!

Jodi said...

Thanks for all the kind comments and Allison for being such a lovely hostess.

Mayberry said...

How cool is it that you've both written about the song...very nice post.

Jenn said...

it's amazing how even the stuff we didn't want adds in to who we've become - this one will be with me for a while. thanks :)

(via the blog exchange)

jenn in holland said...

Jodi-
First I have to say I love that song too. And beyond that, what a great way to tie it together with a deeply thoughtful personal experience. Wonderful post. So glad you were here today!